The Journey of "Seeking Truth" Part 2

It's been a long night of "wrestle mania" .... Whew is all I can say .... There are places we come to in our journey's that we encounter "Ourselves" it is at these places we sometimes become entangled with "The TRUTH" .... someone else had some wrestlings with the TRUTH too .. in the Bible .....
Genesis 32: 22 And he rose up that night, and took his two wives, and his two womenservants, and his eleven sons, and passed over the ford Jabbok. v23 And he took them, and sent them over the brook, and sent over all that he had. v24 And Jacob was left alone; and there wrestled a man with him until the breaking of the day. v25 And when he saw that he prevailed not against him, he touched the hollow of his thigh; and the hollow of Jacob's thigh was out of joint, as he wrestled with him. v26 And he said, Let me go, for the day breaks. And he said, I will not let thee go, except thou bless me. v27 And he said unto him, What is thy name? And he said, Jacob.
v28 And he said, Thy name shall be called no more Jacob, but Israel: for as a prince thou hast power with God and with men, and hast prevailed. v29 And Jacob asked him, and said, Tell me, I pray thee, thy name. And he said, Wherefore is it that thou dost ask after my name? And he blessed him there. v30 And Jacob called the name of the place Peniel: for I have seen God face to face, and my life is preserved.

    Wrestlings .... oh my, oh my .... The whole crux of the matter is .... CHANGE .... and the ideas, ideal's, concepts, motives and attitudes .... come under fire ..... it's down on the "mat" time and the round begins .... only this wrestling match is just a ONE ROUNDER .... cause I was determined to not let go till I had an answer ..... The Journey of Seeking Truth part #1 was me going into the match ...... so much built up in my mind and emotions I wasn't sure where to begin. This morning the answer came .... SOFTLY .... not in blaring lights or loud trumpets of victory... but in a gentle soft resolve .... a whisper of an answer .... I had to CHOSE to listen to.
   
    THE ANSWER ..... was not that of loud demands or threats of annihilation ..... it was not an overwhelming "THIS IS THE WAY TO DO THIS" ..... but a soft gentle whisper almost totally unrecognizable. ..... Deep inside me .... It's still so new I am not sure about it .... I am afraid to even hardly move .... like a shy kitten who may bolt at any moment .... But I know .... it is there like the smallest seed, planted in furrowed fertilized soil ..... one small seed!! ...... I must water it with obedience ..... was reading a Pastor ' Facebook page .... I hope this isn't wrong but I have to post what he wrote .....
     By: Tom Springer .... Can I tell you something else this morning? The Holy Spirit, God right down here in the now, God with us, can be grieved, blasphemed, hindered, quenched and resisted. That cannot be said of God in Heaven and is not said. But, it is said of the Holy Spirit. So, we just honor, honor, honor the form of God not present, while resisting if by no other means, then marginalizing the form of God’s very presence. I sometimes wonder how grieved, how hindered, how quenched He actually is. I know this, where He is honored, sought after, daily experienced divine life flows easily, like promised, like a river. I know this, where we mind the things concerning the Spirit, condemnation lifts off us and we have life and peace with God. I know that because of experience, I know that because the B.I.B.L.E tells me so.

    This piece here, this morning .... finally allowed the smallest of voices to become audible in my spirit.  The struggle will be to walk in this newness .... to obey what I know I have to do ..... BUT .... let me make this perfectly clear ..... this is AN ANSWER FOR ME !! not the world, not my friends or family not anyone else ..... it has become MY CHOICE ..... and I choose this day whom I will serve .

         .... Ok so what was the struggle?? ....... my concepts, ideals and attitudes about my appearances .... my hair, my, earrings, and my mode of dress .... although my mode of dress was resolved a while ago.  .... and yes I have choosen to wear a skirt or dress and not pants ..... (and yes sometimes when I have to do a man's job because of who I am and what I do for a living and because we own our own home and sometimes you have to just DO IT ... cause you can't afford to hire anyone .... I will have to don pants .... ) other then that ... I am trusting God to provide for me the necessary needed apparel to wear to accommodate this change.  ..... BUT ..... YES .... back to the struggle .... my earrings and hair .... oh me, oh my ..... TRUST was an issue ..... I was able to trust God for the provision of skirts and dresses BUT ..... I DID NOT WANT TO ENTERTAIN, THINK ON OR EVEN CONSIDER I COULD TRUST HIM WITH THE EAR-LOBES AND MY HAIR SITUATION !! sigh !!!!! again it was a long night of wrestlings ..... My earrings were a major thing ..... to me .... they were a symbol, and a part of me .... they were a comfort and a constant companion. ........ They had become a small idol!! ....... I was at war over them in my mind and heart ....... YET ...... YET ..... I knew I had to tear down all idols in my life .... I kept hearing .... "yet I have somewhat against you" .... deep down inside me ..... that still small voice. ...... then this morning .... actually within the last few minutes ..... I am hearing stronger inside me this peaceful still voice gentle and kind ..... "if you can trust Me with your clothes, you can trust Me with your earlobes and hair ..... I will provide!! ......... PROVISION .... let me share with you ..... I have not owned a dress or skirt for years ..... about 2 or 3 years ago a skirt came into my posession and I just kept it .... I couldn't get rid of it .... actually it kind of got buried in my wardrobe .... then my daughter left me a black dress .... it was her grandmother's ..... again I thought I'd keep it for sentimental reasons ..... I wore pants to church for years and continued to wear them to this new church ..... for a time .... then one day I got out the dress then the skirt to wear .... I shared with others I didn't have any skirts or dresses except the two pieces and ask God to provide ..... I was TRULY BLESSED!! with a whole new wardrobe. ....... SOOOO .... back to this new territory of my earlobes and hair ..... I am taking a stand God will provide because that ...... mirror in my bathroom really dictates to me on a daily basis who I am, how I feel and how I look ...... as a woman .... I have it ingrained in me by our culture THIS IS IMPORTANT!! ........ BUT ........ THE HOLY SPIRIT is now ingraining in me how I am ADORNED INSIDE IS EVEN MORE IMPORTANT!! ........... so .... my TRUTH SEEKING Journey is under way again ....... Blessings !!

The Journey of "Seeking Truth"

What is TRUTH?
John 8:32   And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

1st John 1:4 And these things write we unto you, that your joy may be full.
v5 This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. v6 If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:  v7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanses us from all sin. v8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us

John 3:21 But he that does truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.

John 4:23 But the hour comes, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeks such to worship him. v24 God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.

     I think ... for everyone who just wants the truth, seeking it and the journey is 99% of the battle. But truth be told TRUTH is like a gold mine .... a vein here and a vein there running through the mountain of false statements, ideals, teachings & lies, man made customs, cultures and practices, born from generation to generation .... but once you get a taste of TRUTH, your like a blood hound on a search to find it .... then you need to find more and more .....  

     Years of growing up and attending several different religious denominations .... Each one having their own set of rules, beliefs and culturally accepted practices ..... has brought me to this place in my life. ...... 

      In each different belief system there has been accepted things and taboos" and "no no's" accepted as "sacred, scriptural &  spiritual" ...... In each setting there is those who comply readily, those who do for a season and those who question after a time ....... It is "those who question things after a time" I probably fall into more often then not ...... and for me it is like a nemesis to me .... ( for those who want the actual meaning of "nemesis") it is a noun, plural nemeses  [nem-uh-seez] 1.something  a person cannot conquer, achieve, etc.: (The performance test proved to be my nemesis.)

2.opponent or rival whom a person cannot best or overcome.

This seeking truth of all things isn't always my friend .... I find I loose more friends and make more "enemies" then I can count ..... simply because somethings I can't just accept as TRUTH what they tell me ..... 

       TRUTH .... despite it's cost is like owning priceless jewels, diamonds and gold! .... Once you find it you hid it deep inside and cling to it, protect it and hold onto it ...... 

      So ..... what if ..... you come across a situation, where you end up in a place that you truly love ... And you hear the truth spoken not just a smattering or a goodly helping, Not the truth mingled with some man made customs and practices but the REAL TRUTH? ...... BUT ........ along with this rare find of pure gold TRUTH ..... is others who adhere to "things & beliefs", .... customs that have been accepted as"truth" that you know different ..... Not that you couldn't abide by the practices or customs but as a principle that has been ingrained so deeply in you to KNOW THE TRUTH ..... that now the conflict begins again .....  

    John 4:23 But the hour comes, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeks such to worship Him. ....... We are to worship in spirit and TRUTH ...... again ... what is truth? ...... I attended a Bible Study for a season .... It was awesome .... We sang, we worshipped then we studied the Word ..... Sigh!! ..... Then the leader began to insist we hang up anything from the outside world and get into worship ..... like NOW !!! ..... and there was nothing wrong with the basic concept ..... EXCEPT .... I literally left work in the evening and drove the mile and a half to the Bible Study ..... with literally sometimes the "world on my shoulders" .... I needed .... a few minutes to shake it off and get with it ...... BUT ..... that's not what the leader really had in mind ..... I loved this person dearly ..... they would spend sometimes hours prior to coming to lead the study in prayer and worship ..... some of us who attended came directly from our jobs and the world outside ..... I could not fake it and would not fake it ..... How could I fake worship in spirit and truth if I had to fake it ... It may have been in some kind of "spirit" but definitely not in TRUTH!

From there crept in some "false teachings". When I confronted the leader in regards to some of the "false teaching" they were not receptive ..... I showed them scripturally that it was a false teaching ..... NOTHING ..... and sadly I had to choose not to go back. 

      So what is the big "situation" now you ask? ........ actually over the years I had been acquainted with several people from this particular line of beliefs ..... all women, all really nice people ....... BUT .... sadly prone to lying .... one precious lady who I worked with informed me after I caught her in a rather bold face lie .... "that it was ok to tell me anything she wanted because I was going to hell anyway"...... (this was after we had, had numerous discussions about our identical shared beliefs in Jesus Christ. ) yep .... I was hurt!! baffled!! and totally taken off guard! ) Another fine lady was a business owner of a hobby store, I stopped by one day thinking I would become involved in this particular hobby I use to find great pleasure in doing ....  matter of fact had done for some years so I was fairly knowledgeable. As I began to ask her questions she began to"tell me things I knew different" ..... I tried to ask questions several different ways feeling maybe she didn't understand me .... NOP! .... she was just being her religious self and lying!! .... I was wearing clothing, jewelry and had my hairstyle in opposition to her religious beliefs. ....... so now what's my dilemma? ..... I am smack dab .... @ a church where 1/2 of the population believe like this .... and the other half really still believe like this but is willing to accept those who dress & look different .... BUT still feel that you may be going to hell and unable to have the Holy Spirit unless you stop wearing jewelry & stop cutting your hair. ...... and the Pastor is awesome and just preaches the truth and doesn't touch these issues .... He feels it's for me to decide. 

     So what have I decided?? .... THAT I AM WADING THROUGH A VERY DEEP MUDDY SITUATION ... that I am not sure how to wade out of or can fully accept until totally examined from every angle.  .......  John 8:32   And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. ..... What is the truth here? ....... After much study in in the Word and diligently looking up passages in 1st Timothy 2:9, 1st and Peter 3:3 & 5 where it addresses women specifically 

1st Peter 2:8 I will therefore that men pray every where, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting. v9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

v10 But (which become women professing godliness) with good works. v11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. v12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. v13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.

 v14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

v15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

NIV 8 Therefore I want the men everywhere to pray, lifting up holy hands without anger or disputing. 9 I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, 10 but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.

11 A woman[a] should learn in quietness and full submission. 12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man;[b]she must be quiet. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner. 15 But women[c] will be saved through childbearing—if they continue in faith, love and holiness with propriety. (what about those women who can't bear kids due to health or physical reasons? do they go to hell?) God forbide !! NO .... if they accept Jesus as their Lord and Savior they go to heaven like everyone else who accepts His death, burial, & resuurection ... 

The Message ... 8-10 Since prayer is at the bottom of all this, what I want mostly is for men to pray—not shaking angry fists at enemies but raising holy hands to God. And I want women to get in there with the men in humility before God, not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it.

11-15 I don’t let women take over and tell the men what to do. They should study to be quiet and obedient along with everyone else. Adam was made first, then Eve; woman was deceived first—our pioneer in sin!—with Adam right on her heels. On the other hand, her childbearing brought about salvation, reversing Eve. But this salvation only comes to those who continue in faith, love, and holiness, gathering it all into maturity. You can depend on this.

1st Peter 3: 3 & 5 3 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:

1-4 The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.

4-6 Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as “my dear husband.” You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated.

OK ... a whole doctrine was developed ages and eons ago from these verses ... 1st Corinthians 11:14 - 15 ... v1 Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ. v2 Now I praise you, brethren, that ye remember me in all things, and keep the ordinances, as I delivered them to you. v3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. v4 Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonors his head. v5 But every woman that prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven. v6 For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered. v7 For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man. v8 For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man. v9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. v10 For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. v11 Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. v12 For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God. v13 Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered? v14 Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? v15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering. v16 But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God. v17 Now in this that I declare unto you I praise you not, that ye come together not for the better, but for the worse.

1 Cor.11 1-2 It pleases me that you continue to remember and honor me by keeping up the traditions of the faith I taught you. All actual authority stems from Christ.

3-9 In a marriage relationship, there is authority from Christ to husband, and from husband to wife. The authority of Christ is the authority of God. Any man who speaks with God or about God in a way that shows a lack of respect for the authority of Christ, dishonors Christ. In the same way, a wife who speaks with God in a way that shows a lack of respect for the authority of her husband, dishonors her husband. Worse, she dishonors herself—an ugly sight, like a woman with her head shaved. This is basically the origin of these customs we have of women wearing head coverings in worship, while men take their hats off. By these symbolic acts, men and women, who far too often butt heads with each other, submit their “heads” to the Head: God.

10-12 Don’t, by the way, read too much into the differences here between men and women. Neither man nor woman can go it alone or claim priority. Man was created first, as a beautiful shining reflection of God—that is true. But the head on a woman’s body clearly outshines in beauty the head of her “head,” her husband. The first woman came from man, true—but ever since then, every man comes from a woman! And since virtually everything comes from God anyway, let’s quit going through these “who’s first” routines.

13-16 Don’t you agree there is something naturally powerful in the symbolism—a woman, her beautiful hair reminiscent of angels, praying in adoration; a man, his head bared in reverence, praying in submission? I hope you’re not going to be argumentative about this. All God’s churches see it this way; I don’t want you standing out as an exception.

      Clothing, jewelry & hair ..... short , long , men & women ..... a lot to think on .... A lot to consider .... For me as a woman ..... I have dressed accordingly as most of our culture does here in America, I have without much ado .... chosen jewelry, cut my hair, dyed my hair and wore hair styles complimentary of this age for a woman. ..... During this period of my life I have experienced the baptism of the Holy Spirit, with evidence of speaking in tongues, I have ministered, I have taught, I have been part of services where the Holy Spirit was strong on me (all this was done @ one time or another wearing the attire and adorned with pieces of jewelry, pants, and cut hair. ) Now .... where I am at, I am being told to let my hair grow naturally, remove the earrings & jewelry, and wear only dresses or skirts. ....... The Pastor says my choice ..... in my time ..... yet I have those who feel .... indicate .... slightly mention .... make reference to .... the matter that I am not saved if I wear earrings and cut my hair ...... Here is the dilemma ..... years of believing one way clashing with a belief system that I have felt for years is cultic, and not scriptural .... Now I am seeing that for some .... YES it is false teachings .... and yes false teachings open the doors to a lying spirit ..... BUT .... then there is the concept that .... we as a woman chose to accept this varying form of "dress" to say we are different, that we have chosen to follow this belief , this way of truth ..... For me .... it has been a conflict of who I am and who I want to be .... a conflict of who I want others to see me as and who are they who see me? .... I have not had "long" hair since 1971 .... In the preceding years I have had it shoulder length .... but that was it .... I also have dyed my hair .... tried to go naturally gray only to feel like YUK!!!! .... so I went blonde instead. ....... and my earrings became part of my attire in 1976 .... I was 22 and had my ears pierced.  I am now turning 61. ....